Choosing never land

So here we are almost 3 years later and so much has changed; and then again so much hasn't. You see last time I scrawled on this, the tiles of my online stall, my life had just started looking up, well at least horizontal and the there was imminent change stirring in the conditioned air of my office cubicle. 

 

I was sitting in my 5^th status meeting, regarding the status of a previous meeting, updating my Facebook status, then all of a sudden my subconscious dichotomies met and merged into one semi-coherent thought - “Why would I choose this version of my life?” and with that I chose to escape my current reality. But to what, how and where was still very much open to internal deliberation.

Dichotomies

So in true mid level management procedural flare, I made a action plan. A list of desired outcomes based purely on the needs of my client, me.

1. No more desks. (Seriously fuck desk, they are ¾ completed coffins)
2. Outdoors is where it is at. (I need the sun on my face to have it in my heart)
3. Must use body (It's not gonna be in functional shape for much longer)
4. Travel would be nice (Intagram is a poor substitute for the real thing)
5. Must make money. (I am poor and owe many institutions much moola)

Then as I stared out my window doing some post internal-meeting blue sky thinking, I saw a little sailboat skip along in the bay and my brain did that thing it does when it draws four as a conclusion.

Tatum's basically the spokes person for my brain.

Got on the phone and called a friend of mine, who had been working in the yachting industry for years and he bestowed upon me all his wisdom. With all this new found knowledge I proceeded to quit my job the next day, when asked to what end my reply garnered much bemused, and I imagine deserved, shock. 

A Kalahari boykie, born and raised, never set foot on a boat, was leaving his cushy desk job to become a sailor. Based in a decision he had made yesterday. But then again sometimes all you need to dig yourself out of a hole is a toothpick and the desire to breathe free.

Expert sailors compared to me

So I sold my worldly possessions and did a few courses, begged a crusty sailor for a job and hitched a ride across the Atlantic on a 48 foot catamaran and 54 days later I set foot on the shores of America; and was promptly asked to leave.*

But once again my very good friend, mentioned previously, saved my bacon. Through many favors being called in, creative canoodling and much grease of the elbow, I managed to procure a Job and start my yachting career.

Which was, for the first few months, what we call "yardwork". Here I learned many new skills, mostly involving noxious chemicals, large moving parts, explosions and what a real “hard day at the office” looked like.

Not like this.

But I digress. The reason I started writing this was to tabulate the cost benefit of a life at sea for the uninitiated. A list of what was lost and what was gained and if in fact I grew as a person. Which is similar to reality checks, underwritten by the morally bankrupt. Which brings me to my first point on the agenda.

PRO: See the world – CON: Miss your friends and family

I've seen large parts of the globe, so much more than I would have ever seen from my office chair. The states, Bahamas, Carribean, Europe – a list of countries I never even imagined I would have seen, nor would ever have been able to afford to see. 

I have also missed so many weddings, birthdays, funerals, Sunday family get togethers and life in general that it's almost criminal. Seeing the world and falling of the planet are really much more similar than you would think.

PRO: Meet lot's of new people – CON: Meet lot's of new people

You will meet a never ending stream of crazy, cool, well worth it to get the know people. Mazillions of fresh faces, new stories and Facebook friends and then you never see them again. It's emotionally exhausting, plus I just got use to my old friends. Dammit I'm old. 

PRO: Make lots of money – CON: Have zero time to spend it

Although this sounds like a great savings plan; and it is, I cannot emphasize how much like a prison camp a super yacht can feel like after three months of back to back charters. Them Dollars tho.

PRO: Your crew become like family – CON: Bunk beds and lacking personal bubbles

You will learn to love your fellow crew members and grow ever closely knit, as you share your lives together and it can be quite a rewarding experience. 

You will also share limited space, sleep on top of each other and what ever personal detail you missed through the walls will inevitably find it's way to you down the stew grapevine. It can get very involved, if you like your own space, you are shit out of luck.

PRO: You work in paradise – CON: Some crew are confined to quarters

If you work on deck you get to take the guest skiing, diving, swimming and race around paradise on million dollar tenders, while working on a bitching farmers tan. 

On the other hand the stews are mostly ironing, cleaning and vacuuming inside looking at the big blue from the waterline through tiny portholes, for weeks. Weeks.

PRO: Yachtie life-style - CON: #Yachtielife

Sure you get room, board, 5star chef grub, occasional days off in paradise, but mostly you are playing janitor and maid on someone's ocean caravan. 

As oppose to lies on Instasham. They might be holding an umbrella drink on a beach in that selfie today but I assure you its a shammy mop or toilet brush for weeks to follow. #lookatallthefunimhaving

Let me just take a selfie #yachtielie

PRO: You work in Never Never Land - CON: Everyone else have actual lives

You job is centered around creating a opulent work of fiction, where no one grows old and everyone gets what they desire. A fairytale world that goes on forever and ever. Let's just say if you don't like the real world there is always one place you can go.

Thing is, life happens outside of this bubble and having a foot in both worlds is near impossible. Relationships strain and break, all your friends are getting married and posting baby pictures and you stay a lost boy on an island somewhere. Let's just say natural progression can get severely stunted.

Second star on the left and straight on till morning.

So lots of conflicting data to deal with there. Looks like a draw. 

Oh but wait, I also now have zero debt, a bitching motorcycle and all the new toys to finally record some of the songs I've been writing for years. I have also passed my Yachmaster*, grown a bitchin beard and have been on vacation for two months. 

I'm telling you I might be more than a decade late but 18 year old me would be well impressed.

So am I sad I quit my desk job? Ah bugger it #yachtielife**

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*this all happened over the course of a few months and the stories of this journey are many and filled with wonder, resentment, truth, justice and the American way. But I think that is a story for another time.

**That's a 200 ton yacht license. All those on the high seas beware!

***I will never use this term without huge loads of sarcasm under most circumstances but I might just mean it in this case.